Monday: A junior analyst misspells “Kinect” ( as “kin-x”) triggering Wall Street panic, the resumption of the cold war between eastern and western blocs and flooding in Antarctica. Scientists consider it the embodiment of the “butterfly effect” and are thrilled to observe the subtle interplay of global forces.

Tuesday: Ubisoft divests itself of France, which it had purchased in 2009, for an undisclosed sum and a baguette with some cheese. Analysts, still reeling from the “kinect” debacle of the previous day, consider this a smart move, which restores sanity to Wall Street.

Wednesday: Call of Duty: Black Ops relaunch eclipses original launch (of the previous week) with an additional $400 million in sales. Activision chief, Bobby Kotick gleefully calls for Relaunch II, slated for next Tuesday, to be followed a week later with Relaunch III, Relaunch IV and so on until he owns the flipping universe.

Thursday: Scientists discover that excessive exposure to” tower defense” genre video games causes excessive whisker growth in young laboratory rats. Whether a similar manifestation will occur in humans is now under investigation.

Friday: Bowser, King of the Koopas, receives a shock when his annual budget is halved by the Koopa Kongress. “We just can’t afford his excesses and whimsical criminal activity any longer,” says speaker of the assembly, Lenny Koopa.

Saturday: Kotaku releases list of 25 Worst Video Game Snacks as voted by its readers. Top on the list, S’mores. “You can’t eat s’mores without completely f—ing up your controller. No matter how yummy they are, stay away!”

Sunday: Angry Sausage Race Slaughterfest becomes top App Store seller, prompting the question: “Does anyone really need anything but iPhone/iPad/iPod Touch to enjoy the very best in video game entertainment,” from guy claiming to be Steve Jobs.